Who was she and why is she acting to weird? First impressions are important, and she makes an indelible one.
The clothes are astonishing. She is not one to wear subdued hues, no gray, pastels or beiges for her. And she didn’t tiptoe around. No, she went everywhere taking giant strides as though she was heading to the finish line of a race, and coming in first, of course. In the same way, she greeted every day with gusto and curiosity, jumping out of bed and into whatever colorful costume brought her joy that day.
For some people, she was too loud, too opinionated, too argumentative. Not for me. I’m on the quiet side, and she somehow balanced me. She could hold an entire roomful of people spellbound and laughing within minutes of her arrival. But her humor wasn’t vindictive or crude. She often held herself up as the butt of the joke. She wasn’t shy about admitting her follies, her mistakes, and used them to illustrate her point. We all are human, and isn’t that the biggest joke?
At a movie offering for retirees, she’d walk in and loudly declare, “What a lot of old fogeys! I’ve found my peeps!”
She wasn’t always grandstanding. She could be perceptive about other people’s moods too. A friend going through a divorce would open their door to a large bouquet of flowers, just to brighten their day. She never avoided hospitals, and visited regularly to patients and their families. Maybe, growing up Southern had something to do with it. And she wouldn’t bring her baggage to the situation. She would listen, without judgment, and would support, without advice.
Parties were her thing. And she shone at them, whether or not she was hosting. Her everyday clothes were stunning, but her party togs were incredible. She loved being as outrageous as possible, without going too far. No cultural appropriation for her. But she did love themes. It goes without saying that Halloween was a favorite holiday and the theater a particular love. She was Auntie Mame personified.
Did I tell you about the time she organized a party for Carol’s 60th birthday? She had us all dress as bag ladies, and arranged for Carol to meet us at our favorite cafe. She had visited Goodwill and had a house dress that she stuffed the bosom to sag to her waist. Her hat was right out of Aunt Bea of Mayberry’s closet, festooned with fruit dripping off the brim. And her glasses! Of course they were butterfly-shaped and matched the dress. A faux fox fur wrap completed her ensemble. When poor Carol entered the venue, late as always, we all stood and sang Happy Birthday, to her.
Part of her charisma was due to her gift of storytelling. She had lived a full life and had encyclopedic knowledge besides. And the stories always contained a great deal of humor. I think that is what made her such a popular guest. I know I loved being her friend.
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