THE CURE TO LONELINESS IS TO DECORATE ONE'S INNER HOUSE

Loneliness, just like other emotions, is a choice.  It’s a message that I tell myself when I am feeling left out, or ill, or depressed, or hounded by dreary thoughts.  All my own doing.  Most of us are firm believers in the numerous messages that we are bombarded with each day in the media, newspapers, in our families, friends, churches, and society in general.  Some good.  Some we get fixated on.  Maybe we are sad because we miss places that we have lived and didn’t want to leave or we had to leave because of a job or a commitment.  Maybe we live in isolated places or in isolation itself.  Some of us prefer being lone wolves and for others bothered by the lone “state.”  Or we miss those who have gone on ahead of us.  What to do?  For those of us who live alone and for those who live alone surrounded by family and other folks, the answer can be elusive.  I have had dogs for companions who have been my family members for a long, long time.  They are a responsibility that stares me in the face each and every day that I choose to have.  Just looking at their adoring little faces and chuckling over their antics puts me in a better place.  Knowing someone adores me, warts and all, doesn’t hurt either.  I have learned that in order to decorate my inner house I need stability and responsibility to cure the lonlies.  I find that I focus on happiness, which is a choice.  Loneliness.  Happiness.  It’s a no-brainer.  Pema Chodron states that “often happiness comes in ways we don’t even notice.  The key is to be here, fully connected with the moment, paying attention to the details of ordinary life.  By taking care of ordinary things, - our pots and pans, our clothing, our teeth - we rejoice in them. When we scrub a vegetable or brush our hair, we are expressing appreciation: friendship toward ourselves and toward the living quality that is found in everything.  This combined mindfulness and appreciation connects us fully with reality and brings joy.  Joel Osteen says that “You can’t wait for circumstances to get better.  You have to create your own good fortune.  So look for a way to be happy every day.” He also said “See, when you drive home today, you’ve got a big windshield on the front of your car.  And you’ve got a little bitty rearview mirror.  And the reason the windshield is so large and the rearview mirror is so small is because what’s happened in your past is not near as important as what’s in your future.”  We each have a finite number of minutes, hours, days, months or years left on this planet.  We can waste them being lonely or we can decide to decorate our inner selves with happiness, filling ourselves with laughter, love, kindness and acceptance, building, indeed, a lovely inner palace in which to dwell.